As I See It

2010-12-20T16:23:00.000-08:00

I have been in a deeper contemplative mood the last week or two, amongst the chaos of INSANE hours for work before the holidays.

And one thing we've been talking about a lot around the team I work with is that 2011 really feels like its going to be a phenomenal and powerful year. My way of thinking about it, I feel like I stumbled into 2010 and hit the road running without pause to vision and be intent-full. I feel like I am heading into 2011 focused, energize, excited and ready to create a new paradigm for myself and life around me.

How do you feel heading into the new year?

In addition, tonight is the Solstice; the longest night of the year. Today is the day to honor the darkness, honor the inward journey knowing that this is the way through. Now, the light will slowly increase and its time to vision forward to what light will manifest in our lives. I feel like this year's solstice has extra potency with there being a Lunar Eclipse tonight. The moon's wisdom is that of the cycles, of women's mysteries, of the phases of life from ebb to flow to ebb again. It leads me, this night, to consider how my own patterns and phases my be blinding me from my own self, my own spirit. It leads me to meditate on how, in the darkness of my soul or spirit, my shadow self makes it seem as if the light can't possibly be there. And then, from there, I know it is all a reflection of the same spirit. The light was never gone. It's all an illusion!

So, rather than contemplate what "New Year's Resolution" might be the one for this year. I inquire of you....let's share....what reflections you might have in this season. What vision do you want to create for 2011. How do you want to move through the illusion of your shadows, of the darkness, into greater and brighter light?

I know for myself...the light I am seeking is that of Balance. How can I balance heart and mind. How can I balance taking care of myself and having clear boundaries about my needs and desires while still upholding my commitments and fulfilling my sense of responsibility. I am also feeling an ending to many phases of my life, unsure what exactly will fill the new spaces created by letting go. Although I feel deep inner reflection and quietness at this time, I feel exhuberant about new ideas, new possibilities, etc. I can't wait to move my body, to commit to dancing regularly again. I can't wait to balance work and personal and even within my work, to find equilibrium between my brain, my heart and my spirit. I'm looking forward and visioning letting my priestess, my shaman, my healer, my teacher out again to connect and carry forth in my leadership. I am visioning peace, ease, grace, and joy.

Blessed Solstice, my friends,
Missy

Landing

2010-08-20T11:12:00.000-07:00

So, wow, its been crazy lately.

Stress levels have been insanely high. I've had every single one of my personal little "gremlins" in my head telling me I'm not good enough, etc, screaming at me and yet, through all that, there has been sweetness, fun and connection.

I am just now landing from this year's Phoenix Fire (the big fire circle event I help organize every year). This year was a tough one. Big issues that challenge the moral compass amongst the community and I, trying to hold it all within the container of love and compassion. It's hard to listen to everyone, empathize with all perspectives and then have to make decisions that are guaranteed to upset some person or 5. oy vey!

On the other hand, the circles were magical, the staff stepped up to the plate and made things run smoothly. We said goodbye, after 10 years, to the special magical land we've called home each summer for Fire Circles. It was emotional, it was hard and I look forward to the future with enthusiasm and hopes of something different, new, fresh and magical in its own way.

I came home to getting sick. I wore my body completely out. I came home to "real life" and work. I love my job AND I've totally sucked at it lately. Not sure what to do about it and getting my act together. Self discipline is not a strong point for me. I'm searching my soul and my life for the tools and access to what can move me forward and through this wall I see before me. I know, I must reconnect to spirit and inspiration. I've lost that along the way.

It is time to seek the guidance of the Grandmothers. It is time to deepen into my connection with spirit and allow that to inspire and guide me. It is time, really, to start doing something different from what I have been doing. I'm tired, worn out and feel like I put a great deal of effort out into the world with minimal result. I feel like I am working backwards instead of forwards and that is INCREDIBLY frustrating. I feel like its all just not good enough...for me or for those around me.

Looking towards this fall, it will be time to gather the harvest. Gather my resources and prepare for the internal work of the winter. In that, I hope, I find support. Maybe even some answers.

The warmth of the fire glows inside of me. It may feel like the slightest bit of embers right now, but it is still there. It's time to heat it up, fire it up, tend the fire and make space for it to grow, to burn, to light me up from the inside out. I feel that fire, that last night and the heat of the early morning deep in my heart. Now, it's time to let it shine out.

Ready

2010-02-04T20:36:00.000-08:00

"I am ready for love
Why are you hiding from me?
I'd quickly give my freedom
To be held in your captivity

I am ready for love
All of hte joy and the pain
And all the time that it takes
Just to stay in your good grace

lately I've been thinking, maybe you're not ready for me
maybe you think I need to learn maturity
They say watch what you ask for, 'cause you might receive
But if you ask me tomorrow, I'll same the same thing

I am ready for love
Would you please lend me your ear?
I promise I won't complain
I just need you to acknowledge I am here

If you give me half a chance, I'll prove this to you
I will be patient, kind, faithful and true
To a man who loves music, a man who loves art
Respects the spirit world and thinks with his heart

I am ready for love
If you'll take me in your hands
I will learn what you teach
And do the best that I can

I am ready for love
Here with an offering of
My voice, my eyes, my soul, my mind
Tell me what is enough to prove I am ready for love
I am ready."

Lyrics from "Ready for Love" by India Arie

Phoenix Fire 2009 Golden Moments

2009-08-25T00:18:00.001-07:00

On August 14th, 140 of us gathered in the magical redwoods to dance, sing, play and drum around the fire all night for 3 nights in a row! This gathering was exactly that, a gathering, a coming together of people from all different backgrounds to create a 'village' and place that supports one another in working together to co-exist, problem solve, create, heal, transform and connect. The following is a quick video I made talking about some of my 'golden moments' from the past week. There are many more special experiences than can be shared in one video, but this certainly highlights a few. Enjoy!

Yes, my hair looks different! My sweet friends Tabitha and Padme helped me put yarn braids in my hair. I LOVE them!

An Inspiring Story of Friendship

2009-01-13T13:28:00.001-08:00

A friend of mine just sent me the link to this video. Truly, if they can be friends, why can't the rest of us?

Watch CBS Videos Online

New Year Musings

2008-12-31T11:09:00.000-08:00

I am going through my journals from 2004 mapping my Europe trip for a little project and out fell this card that I picked up in Tours, France. It seems appropriate to remember these things at the New Year. (it was in french and following is an english translation) There is something poetic about the french.

La vie...
La vie est une chance, saisis-la.
La vie est beaute, admire-la.
La vie est beatitude, savoure-la.
La vie est un reve, fais-en une realite.
La vie est un defi, fais-lui face.
La vie est un devoir, accomplis-le.
La vie est un jeu, joue-le.
La vie est precieuse, prends-en soin.
La vie est une richesse, conserve-la.
La vie est amour, jouis-en.
La vie est un mystere, perce-le.
La vie est promesse, remplis-la.
La vie est tristesse, surmonte-la.
La vie est un hymne, chante-le.
La vie est une aventure, ose-la.
La vie est un combat, accepte-le.
La vie est un bonheur, merite-le.
La vie est la vie, defends-la.
~Mere Teresa

Life....
Life is an opportunity, grab it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is blissful, savor it.
Life is a dream, make it a reality.
Life is a challenge, meet it head-on.
Life is an obligation, fulfill it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is precious, take care of it.
Life is rich, treasure it.
Life is love, enjoy it.
Life is a mystery, solve it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sadness, overcome it.
Life is a hymn, sing it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is happiness, deserve it.
Life is life, Live it.
~Mother Theresa

Some Magical Humor

2008-12-23T14:40:00.000-08:00

Enjoy!

via videosift.com

Hysterical Holiday Silliness

2008-11-24T10:48:00.000-08:00

Enjoy This!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Create Long Lasting Change, Instantly

2008-11-14T11:19:00.001-08:00

Read below to find out how to get YOUR FULL SCHOLARSHIP (a $150 value) to the Instant Change for Long Term Success Event! I am so excited to share this with all of you!

Join myself, Missy Wilreker and my colleague Clifford Meurer for this One-time Event on Saturday, November 22^nd, 2008, in downtown Santa Cruz.

“Instant Change for Long Term Success: How to make simple changes to create more success at work, at home and look forward to waking up each day!”

Do you feel trapped in your life? Perhaps in your relationship or with a job you don’t like. Do you feel like you go through each day and it just doesn’t feel like ‘you’? We’re here to tell you: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Often, when things in our lives are familiar, they become comfortable and easy, even when they may actually be unsatisfying. It sure seems easier to deal with what is comfortable than make a scary change into the unknown. But….

Is that fulfilling? NO! Is that helping you to achieve your dreams? Probably Not! Are you happy? Most likely not 100%!

Many of us have that day where we look around at our life and ask “How the heck did I get here?” It’s shocking, but true. You look in the mirror and don’t recognize yourself. What happened to those things you were passionate about? The career you dreamed of as a kid, or relationships with people that are fulfilling and exciting. Have you been stuffing all of who you are away to fit in or get along? Once you realize this, the inner battle becomes living in what’s comfortable versus living authentically in the world.

Should you have to choose? We don’t think so!

Are you ready to make the changes you want? It’s Easy! Who would have thought that manifesting the changes of your dreams could be so simple?!

“We’ll teach you how to live passionately and freely using simple step-by-step tools so you can build solid relationships and manifest your dreams more than you ever thought possible!”

You’ll also learn:

- 6 Steps to make lasting change.

- 3 breaths for instant change

- The secret to manifesting positive feedback with every interaction

You’ll walk away from this event with the simple formula for living fearlessly and make the lasting changes you want quickly, easily and confidently!

So, are you ready to break through your fears and live successfully?!

If your answer is “yes” join us on Nov. 22^nd at 1pm for this ONE TIME EVENT in downtown Santa Cruz.

RSVP to mlwld@yahoo.com to register and claim your FULL SCHOLARSHIP!

~Missy & Clifford

PS: We’d love to see you there. Give the gift of positive change and share this scholarship with your friends. Feel free to pass this SPECIAL OFFER on to those people in your life you know are just READY to make change!

Connection To Each Other

2008-10-05T21:21:00.000-07:00

A friend posted this on her blog, Reason Enough, and I agree with her that it helps to feel connected. So, here we go:

Sitting... on my futon in my new 'sitting room' up in the woods.

Smelling... the sweet smell of Copal incense from Mexico (oh wait, now a cat used the litter box just as I was typing this...eeewwww!)

Listening... to my housemate and his girlfriend watching the fabulous movie "Into the Wild" and the thumping of my kitties' feet as they dash back and forth happily in their new home.

Drinking... Iced tea (that I refilled after having just knocked it off the arm of the futon - oops!)

Reading... the Mists of Avalon series by Marion Zimmer Bradley

Also Reading... Where the Hell Is Matt? blog and inventory lists for work - ugh

Loving... living up in the hills a little bit, preparing for a new phase of my life

Dreading... financial crunch, the future of the US economy

Eagerly anticipating... What might be just around the corner that is yet to be known, world change, the success of my latest percolating vision on my gifts for this lifetime.

Worrying... that I don't live fully in gratitude and unconditional love; that I am missing chances to make change and help people; if we are going to completely ruin this beautiful place in which we live.

Wishing... to live comfortably and easefully, people could spend more time honoring each others strengths, listening to each other and helping out, for a home that is my own to live in and share with others

Praying... that all being on all planes, in all places and in all times may be relieved from their suffering and know deep deep peace.

Grateful... for every moment and being in my life; for my abundance of love and joy

Sharing... my heart, my smile, my dreams, my compassion, kindness and these thoughts

Time to Move On

2008-09-16T16:17:00.000-07:00

So, it is now the time for me to move on to another home. Still in the Santa Cruz area, but I am moving up up into the mountains a little bit. I am really excited about this change and really nervous at the same time. As you can see in this picture of my new rooftop (the brown y-shaped roof), when you zoom out, my new home is kind of out there and further away from civilization.

View Larger Map

Now, I know the last time I lived away from town, it was challenging and then I grew to love it, so I hope I do this time as well

My new housemate, Scott, is awesome and I am looking forward to all the new doors, including the ones to my two rooms and bathroom, that may open as a result of this new adventure.

See you soon in my new home!!

Getting Our Needs Met

2008-08-02T12:43:00.001-07:00

So, someone just gave me this great technique through which you can learn what you might need, even if you didn't realize you needed it.

Go to google (or search engine of choice) and type your Name with the word "needs" after it.

Here is what I learned:

Missy needs another cocktail. (right on!)
Missy needs a home.
Missy needs Thai. (yum)
Even Missy needs a new look. (you think?)
Missy needs you. (awwww, so true...)
Missy needs... a patient, caring home with someone willing to put some time in to training her and building her confidence.
Missy needs a new family.
Missy needs a business partner
Missy needs a new hairdo
(those were some of the highlights)

Melissa, on the other hand ...

Melissa needs to take a break (so true!!)
Melissa needs to board the blob ship that is hovering overhead (ROFL!!!)
Melissa needs lots of guidance
Melissa needs to find a new agent
Melissa needs your prayers
Melissa needs inner peace

And, a favorite and true --

Melissa needs a bed in Mexico!!!

Interesting that this should pass my radar at a time when I have been exploring how to better express my needs and find ways to meet them or get them met by others. This seems to be a constant challenge for someone like me who naturally gives to everyone else's needs.

So, what do you need?

Amazing Psychic Healing

2008-06-24T14:27:00.000-07:00

A&E just started running a new hit series called Psychic Kids:Children of the Paranormal last week. Last night's episode, Fear Management, featured a family who are very dear friends of mine from Las Vegas.

I was so excited to see Morgan and Brad along with their parents, Marsha and Craig on the show teaching us all about the amazing Indigo, Crystal and Rainbow children on this planet right now. I was so proud of the example they set about embracing empathic and psychic abilities and how to use those gifts to affect change and healing in the world. They offered such great confidence and support to the other family on the show and helped let other psychics and empaths know that they are not alone in this world.

Marsha has a wonderful organization, Indigrow, which supports families with psychic kids by teaching parents how to deal with the challenges these kids face in today's society as well as teaches the kids how to work with and live with the gifts they have. I love her dream to create more educational experiences that support and develop these kid's talents rather than quaff them.

The following is a conversation between Marsha Calder and Sylvia Brallier, of the Tantric Shamanism Institute. This conversation is so enlightening and interesting that it is split up into a few different videos below so as to include everything:

Morgan, who is 10, has a little extra video on A&E about the energy healing she does and her work with crystals and stones. I have seen her do energetic healing work first hand and she blows me away everytime. I can't wait to see how many ways she manifests her dreams of healing the world with her gifts! Click HERE for her video

Interested in more information about energetic and psychic healing?
Are you empathic, psychic or sensitive to the emotions and energies around you?
Would you like to learn how to develop your psychic abilities?
Are you seeking greater peace, clarity and balance in your life?

Experience strong forward movement in your personal growth, take a look at the Anamcara Life Empowerment Program to learn more! This unique mentored correspondence course will assist you to step into your highest potential. Awaken self awareness and bring about positive change with a large variety of courses or the full Life Empowerment Program! Anamcara means "soul friend" in Gaelic. A soul friend accepts you as you are. This program offers both guidance and support to be a good soul friend to yourself.

Reborn

2008-06-18T01:07:00.000-07:00

I am just now starting to land on this earth again after having spent a few days with one of my teachers, Mata Amritanandamayi (Ammachi or Amma for short). For those that don't know much about her, you can visit her website to learn about who she is and what she teaches. She is my inspirational example of complete and total Unconditional Loving of all people and a model of selfless service.

I have gone to her public Darshans before, where she hugs and loves anyone and everyone who come to her. I have received mantra from her, which I work with almost daily, and have been visiting her on her US tours since 2003. This was my first time on retreat with Amma at her US Ashram in San Ramon, CA.

I don't really know how to detail what my experience was all weekend. I hugged her (or she hugged me, however that works!), 4 blissful times. I also had the opportunity to be seated on the aisle when she entered the hall and got to brush her hand as she went by. I can't believe how a little split-second finger touch could leave my hand smelling strongly like roses for a long time afterwards!

All of her talks were infused with wisdom, stories and great humor. I really enjoyed the interplay between Amma and the Swami who was translating her talks. Many people brought questions to her, some of which were asked and answered publicly. She reminded us to do good, help each other out, take care of ourselves and one another and perhaps together we can all get through the troubling times ahead.

I was blessed with many opportunities to perform Seva, or service including the great honor of helping to distribute the blessed holy water at Devi Bhava (click here for a video about Devi Bhava). I also washed dishes, which has become a sacred service to me, and helped to manage the number signs for the darshan line at Devi Bhava.

Besides many wonderful meditations, enjoying Amma's presence and example, resting under the willows by the pond, laughing at jokes, meeting old and new friends and being fed dinner by Amma's own hands, the most important moment on this visit was when Amma blessed me by naming me a spiritual sanskrit name. I feel so honored that she 'saw' me and named me for what she sees inside of me. She blessed me with the name Jyotirmayi (Jyoti for short). Ask me and I will tell you more!

So, thank you, thank you Amma. In my devotion to you and what you bring to this world and this time......here is a video of the arati to Amma, Mata Amritanandamayi:

Namah Shivaya

Some Addictions Are Good For You

2008-04-02T15:12:00.000-07:00

Usually when we hear the word 'Addiction', we think of things bad for you: drugs, alcohol, sex, television.....chewing nails (ahem!). I think I might have found something good for me, and even fun!

While in Mexico this year on our annual retreat (of which I will blog more at a later date), Billie handed me his set of spinning Poi to play with on the beach one day. For those of you who don't know what poi spinning is, if you have ever seen people spin little balls of fire at the end of a chain around their bodies, this would be what I am talking about.

Around the circle, I have seen people spin fire poi, fire staff, fire fans, flag poi, etc for quite some time. The Poi in particular always seemed like something that I would totally LOVE, and I do! Once in my hands, spinning poi was like a fish to water for me. I now have my own set of LED poi and practice at least an hour if not more a day!

So, yes, this addiction takes some of my precious time away from doing things I should be doing (like working), however it is getting me off the couch, on my feet, moving my body and working out my upper body every day. What could be better?! (Well, okay, don't answer that :) )

Below is a video from YouTube of someone spinning LED poi like the ones I got. I can only hope I spin this well some day. Judging by the black and blue spots on my body...I'll need more time, but a girl can dream!

Make Your Dreams Come True

2008-03-13T12:50:00.000-07:00

Enjoy this moving video:

The Masks We Wear

2008-02-26T22:30:00.000-08:00

Masks are things I put on the outside
To show other people,
Or maybe to show to myself when I look in the mirror.

Heh, mirrors are interesting, too aren't they?
For another time, though.

Sometimes I become the mask.
Or, does the mask become me?

What if,
Each mask was already an inherent part of myself
that I choose to let out now and again?

All the faces are one.
The One has many face-ts.

Inspiring Poetry

2008-02-12T11:15:00.001-08:00

In the end, only kindness matters, in the end

If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we're all OK
And not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I won't be made useless
I won't be idle with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear

My hands are small, I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken

Poverty stole your golden shoes
But it didn't steal your laughter
And heartache came to visit me
But I knew it wasn't ever after

We'll fight, not out of spite
For someone must stand up for what's right
'Cause where there's a man who has no voice
There ours shall go singing

My hands are small I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken

In the end only kindness matters

I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray

My hands are small I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
We are never broken

We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's mind
We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's heart
We are God's eyes

~Jewel, "Hands"

Living A Life of Purpose

2008-02-07T00:56:00.001-08:00

I recently have caught on to the iPod craze and consequently, via iTunes, I started downloading podcasts. One particular set of video and audio podcasts that were reccommended to me were the TED Talks. These talks are actually truly fascinating and inspiring. I stumbled on the below video by Pastor Rick Warren.

I had no idea what I was about to listen to, but it moved me deeply.

What have you been given? How are you going to use those gifts to change the world?

In case you can't view this video, CLICK HERE.

On The Road - Part 4: Taiwan Longshan Temple

2008-01-17T12:42:00.000-08:00

The last day in Taiwan, our flights left quite late in the day. ‘The girls’ (Rae, Nitta, & Sandy) took Jordan and I on a little morning adventure in Taipei before our flight.

First, we went to the Longshan temple. As you can see this is quite a beautiful temple in the city and besides being well known in and of itself, it is also known as the temple near to the snake alley night market I mentioned in one of my earlier posts.

I am so glad that the girls went with us to Longshan because they knew all of the rituals and traditions for visiting the temple. The temple really wakes up and feeds all of the senses. For starters, in the entrance courtyard, there was a spectacular koi pond with waterfalls. This beautiful view created a sense of peacefulness when you walk in as well as forming a sonic container from the business and noise of the street right on the other side of the gateway. I truly love water gardens and Koi ponds! There were quite some magnificent and large koi, just relaxing under the rushing of the waterfalls above.

Past the courtyard, we entered into the next layer of the temple to be assaulted with the thick smoke and smell of burning incense offerings. All around the temple were offering bowls with sticks upon sticks upon sticks of the burning incense. In the center of the temple, was a shrine with the main Buddha statue surrounded by handful of smaller shrines on the perimeter. The girls had us each get a handful of large incense sticks that we would then use for our offerings at each shrine. There apparently was an order in which to make our offerings. I never quite found out or knew how the girls knew which way to go but we followed their knowing lead.

Different shrines were dedicated to different purposes and the girls instructed us as to what kinds of wishes and prayers to offer at each location. Once we made our wishes we were to leave a stick of incense at the burner in front of that shrine. One Buddha we were told is where all the mothers and students go to ask for passing marks before big exams and tests. Another one was to ask for abundance of children and fertility (we passed that one quickly, simply offering our incense with no wishes!) One of the last ones was for asking for the partner you wish to marry. I was instructed to whisper my name, birthday, and a very detailed description of what I wanted. In that case, of course, should my wish come true, I was told I would have to come back and thank the goddess. We’ll see what happens…..!

Each shrine was so intricately detailed with gold, carvings, paintings, offerings and lights. There was so much for the eyes to take in, I felt quite overwhelmed with it all. The smell of the incense ever present and the sounds of people whispering prayers and clacking ‘question blocks’ (for lack of a better term). These blocks were two little wooden pieces that you us to ask a specific question to the Buddha. Basically you pose your question, and toss the blocks. Depending on how they land, the answer is ‘yes’, ‘no’ or ‘undecided’. Along one wall were fortune tellers offering to read your numbers or your palms for a small fee.

Besides the massive input to the senses, I found my heart very moved as I offered my prayers. I spent some time considering the question of what exactly I wish to pray for and the answer always came back the same:

Om Lokaha Somastaha Sukhinu Bhavantu
Om Lokaha Somastaha Sukhinu Bhavantu
Om Lokaha Somastaha Sukhinu Bhavantu
May all beings in all times and all places be free from suffering and know deep deep peace.

I recall feeling tears in my eyes at one point as I felt the depth of that prayer in my heart. Why should I ask the universe for just me? What I want of life, don’t we all want?

It was hard to walk away from the temple. I felt like I could have sat there all day praying and wishing…..but alas, we moved on!

Next the girls took us for a quick bite of lunch. Here we are enjoying our meal, which was the Wa Guei I mentioned in one of my earlier posts about food. Say hi to the camera!!

After a quick lunch, we went into one of the markets, this one being a food market. Talk about a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT attach of the senses!! There were so many smells, fish and meats and fruits, and people, fried foods, grilled foods, etc. The sites were also something to behold. Any part of a fish or pig or foul that you could imagine can be found in the markets like this. As we walked down the narrow alleyway, there would be giant fish and pig heads watching us. Full pork legs with the hoof and all laid out on the butcher counters. Of course, like visiting Chinatown in any major city, there were many many ducks and chickens hanging in the shop windows. One shop even provided some helpful education as to the various types of chicken one might find around the world!

Finally, to end this adventure and head back to the hotel and finally to the airport, we took a brief walk to the subway. Here, like NYC and probably many cities, there was the excitement generated by spectators watching the men play games on the benches near the station. I climbed up on a bench to get a view.

And now, we take our subway ride back to the hotel. Rae, don’t lose your subway token being silly!

All in all, our trip to Taiwan was a good example of the old saying; Work Hard, Play Hard. I really treasure the opportunity to experience different parts of the world. For the full selection of photos I took on this trip, go to my Photobucket Album.

Stay tuned for future “On The Road” blog installments…..next stop…Hainan, China!

On The Road - Part 3: The Show

2007-12-18T22:35:00.001-08:00

Of course, the purpose of our trip to Taiwan was to perform. Our schedule was pretty standard for a tour schedule, pretty brutal for a normal human being's schedule.

We had 4 shows ... in 4 days ... each in a different city in Taiwan.

The first day was of course the most treacherous. Our Magic road cases with all the props and equipment were slow to arrive at the theatre and it was the first day with the technical crew, who only spoke Chinese. Thank goodness for Jack who was Taiwanese and had very good English. He was our sound crew and often technical translator to lighting crew, spotlight operators, curtain operators, and the volunteer setup/breakdown crews each day. We had less time that first day to do the most work.

Of course, we had a few bumps in the road along the way. They started early with our first tech meeting the night I arrived in Taiwan (after over 14 hours of air travel). "We don't have Rosco colors, only Lee and those are limited. We don't have the colors you said. What colors do you want? Those? We don't have those either." We had multiple instances of lights with no frames to hold the color, and basically had to entirely redesign the show daily rather than load in the same show each place and go. The day we loaded into an analog run theatre with our digital equipment was fun. I ran the two-scene preset board(like in the old high school days) while our tech ran the little bit of moving lights and par cans we had on the digital board. Getting the levitation unit and road cases in out of schools and libraries always had its challenges and finding out what curtains, borders, etc were available to us was always an interesting adventure.

I worked mostly with this guy, he was our wonderful head lighting technician. He led the crew each day with our hang and focus in addition to running the lights each night. There are certain things that are universal no matter the language and from what I experienced, when you work with professionals in your field, we all think the same. There were many times when I would give instruction to our translator (who was not a technician, per say), she would relay the information and he would then start to say why it was impossible to do. Before she could translate back, I usually had a good idea of what he was saying and was starting to give instructions for an alternate. Needless to say, words like "Tieng" which meant "STOP!" were useful, and I think that as much as I learned to say "Red, Blue and Pink" in Chinese, they learned the english version. Apparently the concepts of a "Standby" versus a "Go" don't translate so well. I spent a good bit of energy spewing commands like "no, i didn't say go....wait, don't go back now that you went there...wait, but...go! go! hurry! go! you missed it!" However, by the last show, everyone understood what "standby" and "go" meant.

Our schedule was basically show up to the theatre early AM, load in, hang lights, focus, setup everything, do a technical run-through, take a short dinner break (mostly while audience was already starting to arrive), perform, breakdown, drive anywhere from 2-5 hours to the next city that same night, land at the hotel, sleep and do it all over again! And again, and again, and one more time! This kind of schedule works best when we all chip in and help with everything. I really enjoyed learning where the magic props all stored and quickly had my 'roadcase' that I was responsible for. Jordan was awesome with pictures of each case and how it packs. Much like sailboats, everything has a place and it does not work right if that map isn't followed exactly.

As they say, "Practice makes perfect" and by the time we hit the last show in Taipei, we had a mostly well-oiled machine. That theatre was in the Dr. Sun Yat Sen Hall and is the second largest theatre in all of Taiwan. It was a boggling space considering we had started in smaller school theatres and such. The view from the control area is shown here. Jeff, Abbi and Jordan looked like tiny little ants on the stage from that vantage point, but luckily for the audience there was live video feed projected with zoomed in closeups. That show was loads of fun because we could really stretch our legs with effects, rock n'roll and the subtler cueing rather than just trying desperately to get the show plugged in.

Not only did Jeff, Abbi and Jordan perform onstage, but they also did strolling closeup before the show as well as greeting audience members in the lobby.

Part of each show was the time before, after and during intermission that we were selling merchandise. This was also a time that Jeff would sign autographs and take pictures. I really enjoyed watching the excitement on the audience members' faces to get to meet Jeff, Abbi and Jordan and take pictures with them. Although it's tiring after a two-hour performance, I think Jeff enjoys it too, as evident in this picture taken in Hsin-Chu. After the show, there was usually a madhouse scene with people clambering over each other to get to Jeff. Without a doubt, every show had at least one local magic club group who all had their very own decks of cards and memorbilia for signatures. Our last performance, in Taipei, had a particularly impressive crowd, who formed an organized line all around the HUGE lobby of the building to get autographs. Jeff and I were also amused by the 'paparazzi' of people crowding in to take pictures that night, as you can see in my picture of their pictures.
Jordan also looked like he had fun meeting fans, signing autographs and taking pictures.
Overall, after all that, the ups the downs, the challenges and the adrenaline rush's, I can't wait to do it all again! There is nothing more satisfying than watching the audience light up at a surprise or reveal , or being in the groove of the rock and roll at the end of a show.

On the Road- Part 2: Eat Eat, Make You Strong

2007-11-16T14:18:00.001-08:00

Each day we are in a different city around Taiwan and pretty much in the theatre all day long, so lunch and dinner are brought to us. These lunch and dinner boxes (Bien Dang) come in little cardboard and balsa wood boxes, half with rice and half with other goodies. We usually get a piece of fried chicken or some soup on the side along with our box.

Yesterday, in Taichung, I open my dinnerbox and begin to quietly eat my dinner before I run back to the tech table to review cues (only moments before the house opens). Some yummy bok choy, some rice, and then suddenly, I look at the next bite on my chopsticks to realize there is the eye of a tiny guppy-like fish head looking up at me! (kind of like those shown in this picture I took in a market)

um.......Vegetarian Please??

In Taipei, we missed the night market that is known for having food stalls of snake items, such as snake soup. "Oh, good for you. Make you strong." Says Jack, our sound guy, who's relative owns one of these stands. He said to just drink the soup and not eat the meat, but you get to see his cousin cut the snakes open.....oh great!

There were certainly some fun and interesting food experiences as well and although I definitely need a break from chinese food, I still love it, especially now that I know about the traditional ways things are prepared.

After our performance in Kao-Shiung, we were all starving hungry and had a 4 hour drive to the next city and our hotel. It was voted to stop at a Taiwan McDonalds, or McCafe. Most things are the same, although they have more chicken options and less burger options than the American version and they had somehting called a Rice-Burger. This was basically a burger on a bun made out of rice patties rather than bread. I didn't try it as I was not up for risking a burger over chicken. I wouldn't even risk having a burger at a Micky D's in the US, for that matter! They were also really nice at the McDonald's and gave us all green tea iced tea to drink while we waited for our order to be completed. Jeff, finish the sentence....Quarter...... ;)

Our last night in Taiwan, after the very successful Taipei performance, our hosts took us out to Hong Kong style Cantonese dinner. What a delicious meal! I had Kiwi Juice for the first time, yummy! They also had some yummy vegetarian lettuce wraps, dumplings and spring rolls, soup, etc. Lots of joking around and laughing, a little magic at the table, it was definitely a fun and good time had by all and wonderful to sample some really delicious chinese food too!

The last lunchbox that I had, there was a completely delicious green vegetable that I had to ask what it was. You know, asking what something is can be a daring question, often answered with just "eat it, its good for you!". This, however, I was told were flower buds called Jin Zhen. Some research later told me that these were young green lily buds. The girls took us to the market on our last day in Taipei and there I got some dried Jin Zhen (which are yellow or orange). You can actually find these dried lily buds in your local asian markets and I have found out that they are often put into hot & sour soup or moo shu pork (muxiu pork). I can't wait to try out the recipe Nitta gave me for lily bud soup. Yummy! While at the market, we saw many shocking food stalls with all shape and form of animal parts - pig hoofs, whole ducks and chickens, LARGE fish heads, etc. The girls had us taste sugar cane juice, which was cool and refreshing (I have actually had this in Hawaii as well, with just a touch of lime juice add -- soo good!) I also picked up this powder that is made from dried plum, sugar and salt used to dip your fruit in. So yummy!

The girls also took us for a lunch of Wa-Guei, which I don't really know how to explain. This was basically a thick pudding pressed into a bowl with a delicious sauce on top. The pudding had bits of shrimp and meat in it and was so thick a fork would stand up straight in it. Made me think a little bit of bread pudding. The Wa-Geui was served with a yummy soup reminisceint in flavor of vietnamese pho soup with the cilantro and bean sprouts. In the soup were fish meat balls which were ok, but I only had a couple.

This entire trip has certainly re-inspired me to have my dim-sum party at the Chinese New Year that I have dreamed about for a number of years. Now that I have some taiwanese friends to ask for recipes and advice and I have tasted some delicious sticky rice, chicken soup dumplings, cha siu bao, siu mai, etc I have great ideas for the party!

I think eating these things makes you strong. Strong of will for how daring and adventuresome you can be! I certainly feel stronger for having tried some of these various dishes and more willing to 'risk it', to a certain degree, in the future. It was certainly worth every moment of the adventure!

On The Road - Part 1: Taipei

2007-11-15T06:30:00.000-08:00

Here I am, writing while on tour for a few days with Jeff McBride's show in Taiwan. I have many more pictures, but this is a good smattering along with what I did and saw.

After a loooong 14-hour flight from LA, we arrived to great excitement and large welcome by our hosts here and brought to our hotel in downtown Taipei.

And fast asleep I was........zzzzzzz.

Day one in Taiwan and we have a free day in Taipei. We met with Georgia Lee, a local artist and magician that Jeff has a connection with. She took us first to the National Palace Museum. Basically, when the communists took over China, the chinese government fled to Taiwan and took with them all the most precious treasures. The artifacts were hidden in the mountain and are now on display at the museum. From what I understand, this collection is so large and comprehensive that it would take them 40 years to display it all if they switched out the displays every day. It is very reminiscent to the MET. It takes days to see it all. We had an extremely entertaining guide who told us all about the jade, bronzes, and carvings we saw. Jordan and I also wandered around a little bit more after the tour. Unfortunately you can't take photos inside, however the outdoors are beautiful as well, as you can see.

We learned how to identify the images of animals. There are two large eyes, a line in the middle for a nose. Anything at the line above are horns, eyebrows, tails or ears and anything at the line below are mouths and "craws" (claws). This particular face was on the bell outside. Bells were one of the first instruments in China.

So, after we finished at the museum, with a light dim sum lunch, Jordan and I headed to the "Riverfront". This place was like a cross between the Jersey Shore boardwalks and Chinatown. What a strange combination of amusemnts, tourist shops, foods, and fishermen. Once thing we noticed was the mixtures and kinds of smells in Taiwan as you pass different food stalls. There is a strange curiosity about the smells, not always enticing, but they make you wonder. You can't see it in the photo, but the mountain across the river here is called QuanYin Mountain, named after the goddess of compassion.
Along the way, there were a few beautiful temples with gold and colorful carvings, incense burning and this one had some explanation about it in English!

We also came across a little puppet show, as shown on this video.

Back to the hotel for a quick rest. Jordan and I had a Cantonese style Chinese dinner in the hotel with some dumplings, beef with rice noodles, spring rolls and sweet corn egg-drop soup. They had some of the traditional dishes such abalone dishes, shark fin dishes and even birds nest soup, but we were not feeling quite that adventurous! Either way, it was quite yummy! We especially liked the dumplings that have chicken soup right inside the dumpling - mmmmmm! I found it interesting to have the egg drop soup, it is very different from how we have it in the US and very delicious!

Finally, to finish off our evening, we decided to head to one of the night markets. Multiple people suggested Shihlin night market over the market at Longshun Temple, so off we went. This was like a jam packed GIANT flee market with food vendors and clothing, shoes, jewelry, belts, bags, etc. We each picked up a few gifts for some of you and ourselves and enjoyed walking through and taking in the sight. The smells and foods here were certainly.....interesting.

So here I am exhausted and filled with my first taste of Taiwanese culture and city-life. I would imagine that I might like the country better. Taipei feels like a big city. Its busy, dirty and traffic-y like one. Tomorrow is a big day, up early and on the bus to head to our first show location. Who knows what will await us there between the new place and tech-ing in the show. I had better get some rest!

Self Improvement - where is the line?

2007-11-12T11:06:00.000-08:00

So, here is something I think about often in the quest of self
improvement and betterment:

Where is the line between wanting to be 'better' or different and
acceptance of exactly who you are right now?

How do YOU dance that line?

As we head towards the new year, there is often time taken to review
the past year and the future one. We consider what we might want to
change or improve, what did and didn't work. Often resolutions like
"lose weight", "quit smoking", "excercise more" are at the top of the
list.

I just wonder, how do I keep healthy and grow while being accepting of
who I am right now? Do I get stagnant and stuck if I love who I am now?

What do you all think?

To curl, or not to curl....that is the question

2007-11-11T17:32:00.000-08:00

It has been quite a process over the years of my short life to come to a place where I embrace and love my curly hair rather than fight it. I can remember the feeling of dread when my mom would take me to the hairdresser for yet another embarrassing cut. I don't blame her at all, my hair was completely unmanageable. We would often pop the electrical breakers trying to blow-dry it, i used to complain when she would pull it tight into ponytails and brush out the numerous knots. I also had many years of taming the wild curls into a neat and orderly bun for ballet class with hairpins dug into my scalp and lots of dippity-doo gel to hold the strays down!

My childhood school pictures are quite entertaining, there is the 'pyramid-head' look, the short 'clown-hair', the 'poodle-bangs', and others I can't think of right now. I have the pictures of that somewhere.......

The clown hair was particularly memorable. I think my mom got fed up with dealing with my hair and determined to cut it short....real short. That night, I ran up to the bathroom and put a showercap on and wrapped a towel on top of that. I wouldn't take it off all night, for my parents or the babysitters later on!

I remember being teased in junior high for the poodle bangs. You know, what happens with curly hair when you cut it short, it poofs up. Well, I wanted bangs and bangs I had. Just like a poodle. When I would wear a ponytail with the bangs, one kid in school would call me 'the pump', like the popular sneakers at the time where you pump them full of air. He would grab the bangs and pretend to pump them to pump up my ponytail (which was also puffy and curly).

All things being said, having grown up with the last name of "Wiener", these little teases and mortifications were no big deal.

A few years ago, my mom brought me a copy of a book called "Curly Girl". This book has changed my life. I learned how to care for my curls. What makes them curly and stay curly, rather than a frizzball mess (or, if I recall my mom's phrase - a rat's nest). Once I got into the book, the next step was to go to the salon, Devachan Salon, in SoHo. What an amazing place! Filled with curly hair'd people cutting, styling and receiving. I got lessons on every step of my shower and hair care process and since then, I love my curls. I LOVE MY CURLS! and I love them in all climates, weathers, and states.

This brings me to my adventure in the mall the other day. Which, by the way, not to go off topic, I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY HAVE CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS UP ALREADY!!!!!! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO????

Okay, better now.

Where was I? Oh yes, you know how they have those stands in the middle of the mall with really annoying people trying to sell you things, lotions, makeup, dead sea moisturizer, etc? Well before the blink of an eye, these guys had me sitting in a chair in front a mirror while they talk to me about my curly hair. I guess I am sucker to learn about any new product that I can use that follows my strict curly girl guidelines. Next thing you know, they have picked out a section of my hair, clipped the rest aside and had their 'new' ionizing/steaming flat iron straightening my hair!!!! I had fun being really difficult with them *evil grin* The guy kept asking me questions assuming that I tried everything i could to straighten my hair, etc without success.

I finally turned to him and said "Look, I love my curly hair. I am happy with who I am. It took me many years to learn how to love my hair the way it naturally is."

And he just stopped, looked at me, and said "Well, I guess I don' t need to show you any more. I am glad you are happy with who you are." And let me go.

Now I have a damned straight streak in my hair!

PS: it stayed straight overnight and returned to its natural state after a good shower and conditioning. If it didn't curl back up, I was tempted to go back and tell them to make the rest straight so I don't look stupid.

Maybe straight hair could be a look for me? What do you think?

Shaking Shekre - Mother Earth Sings

2007-11-05T12:09:00.001-08:00

There we were, in our second shekere class, shaking it up and having a good time. Suddenly, it was more than just my hands and the gourd shaking. The ground was shaking, the instruments hanging from the ceiling were swinging. Wow! We didn't realize we were making such a ruckus! We stopped....

......the shaking didn't! It's an earthquake!

That beautiful Mama Earth heard us singing, shaking, dancing and awoke! She wanted to feel alive like we felt! I actually loved feeling the sweet vibrations of Mother Earth's voice, feeling the her dance beneath my feet. I felt more connected to her in that moment than I have in a long time.

I know many people have fear about the earthquakes, understandably so. I, however, felt completely in the flow and at one with her vibration. I came away from my first earthquake more at peace than before....

.....and we continued to shake it up! Dancing, playing and Shekere-ing.